Mel Immergut is a Complete and Total Pussy.

Really Mel. Milbank, Tweed, Hadley & McCloy indeed. You're not the least bit like Harvey and Mike, or the rest of Pearson Hardman,  on Suits on the USA channel, my new favorite T.V. program.

The rend to your linen chemise is over the top. Your theatrical pose---straight out of Great Neck, Lon-gi-land---would make even weepy Howard Lutnick look like a Barrymore in comparison. And for the record--you do not personify existential angst just because you've spent a great deal on your dental work. It doesn't obligate you to show us. Spend it on hair transplants next time.

I used to work for Ruben de Saavadre, who was Puerto Rican, but a talented decorator, who made great use of color and had lots of Jewish clients. One could even say he had rectitude---unlike Mr. Jose Jimenez of Primera Hora slash Getty Images. You should have stuck with Maisel or Handschuh like your mother suggested.





And who writes your copy:

Mel Immergut, 54, is chairman of the international law firm Milbank, Tweed, Hadley & McCloy, based across the street from the World Trade Center.

My law firm employs about 800 people and [10 hours later] we have hundreds of people unaccounted for. At the moment, we have no way of tracking them down, so we're trying to organize a phone chain.

The next step for us is to give whatever counseling and aid we can to our employees, some of whom have said that they're not sure they can work in a high-rise again. Then we're going to help others, like the law firms that were in the World Trade Center who no longer have offices to go to. My suspicion is that downtown Manhattan is going to be closed for a good period of time. The most amazing story I heard was from a friend who received an e-mail right before the first plane crashed into the towers, from a friend of his who was on the flight—actually on the flight from Boston to Los Angeles. The e-mail said, "We've been hijacked." And a minute later the plane crashed into the building. The person in the airplane had one of those little BlackBerry portable e-mail machines, and sent his e-mail, probably having no idea the plane was going to crash.